Place it at the very start of the edit as the cold open, before any dialogue or captions appear. Follow the reveal with a record scratch for the twist, then a short sad trombone after the punchline to close the mock bulletin.
關於此聲音
This nine-second theme is a formal broadcast opening, with a rising orchestral line and a steady pulse underneath. It feels instantly serious and dramatic, which makes ordinary news sound urgent and a little ridiculous when it is used for something small. It comes from Jornal Nacional, TV Globo's flagship nightly news program in Brazil, on air since 1969.